Alma 30--All Things Testify

Alma 30 is the chapter that tells us about Korihor.  Korihor went about the land preaching that there is no God and there will be no Christ.  He eventually ends up in front of Alma and I love the approach Alma takes to this.  In Alma 30:40-41 he says:

"And now what evidence have ye that there is no God, or that Christ cometh not?  I say unto you that ye have none, save it be your word only.  But, behold, I have all things as a testimony that these things are true and ye also have all these things as a testimony unto you that they are true..."

He goes onto say that the testimony of their brethren and the Holy Prophets, the scriptures, the earth, and the planets, and the motion of the earth and planets "do witness that there is a Supreme Creator." (v.44)

I love it especially because I think of the naysayers of today and how they are still using the same argument that Satan gave to Korihor.  Whenever I have heard these arguments in the past--that there is no tangible proof there is a God--I have felt on the defensive.  I look around myself and come up without something to point to.  But, truly, it is all around us.  Alma is right.  The testimony of God is everywhere and yet Alma's point did not hold much weight with Korihor, and it doesn't hold much weight today with those who don't want to see.  It seems that there is no other way to gain a real testimony but by the power of the Holy Ghost.

A Holy Calling

I have been thinking about my calling in the church recently and praying about it.  I am in the Relief Society presidency right now and leadership callings are always hard for me.  I have had another one of those experiences with praying and reading my scriptures that I so often get, but that never cease to amaze me.

I had been pondering my calling for some time when in the course of my regular scripture study I read Alma 29.  In this chapter Alma is talking about the missionary efforts put forth by himself and the sons of Mosiah.  Actually, by this time in the chapter he is rejoicing in the opportunity they have had to be instruments in the hands of God.  In and among the wonderful verses of this chapter he says something simple that caught my eye and got me thinking...and praying...and pondering.  For a few days it was in the back of my mind.  In Alma 29:13 he says:  "...God hath called me by a holy calling..."

Yep--that is the simple phrase my mind focused on.  I underlined "a holy calling" and stalled in my scripture study for a while.  In trying to record my impressions and thoughts, I wrote this in my scripture journal:

"I feel as though a calling is less about 'you are meant to be this' as it is about 'I (Heavenly Father) will help you do this!'  A holy calling is one in which the fulfillment of will be aided by divine help and guidance.  Anyone who is willing to be humble and learn will serve well...they will be able to do it.  Perhaps the calling by prophecy [that we read about in the fifth Article of Faith] is less about 'the perfect person for the job' and more about who is ready for that learning experience in their lives.  As we strive to serve others in whatever capacity our callings require, Heavenly Father helps us.  We gain from this a testimony of the reality of our Father in Heaven and can see His loving concern for us and all his children."

Alma 25:16

I have had a few surprising and reoccurring thoughts come into my head lately.  They are thoughts that have been contemplating the difference between "The Church" and "The Gospel."  Normally, I wouldn't separate those two things out.  If you are living the church standards, you are living the gospel, right?

I don't think they are meant to be separated out and so it has been bothering me that my brain has continued to categorize things I do as either "I'm doing this because someone in the Church leadership told me to" or "I'm doing this because it is real gospel doctrine."  I really don't feel like that is right.  I had never done it before.  And so I began to feel like I was missing something, or rather, that I had lost something that I once had.  Was it faith?  I would mentally check up on my testimony...No, faith wasn't my issue.  So what was it that was making me feel this way?

The answer is:  I don't know.  But I know that as I was reading the Book of Mormon the other day, I read something that has helped quiet those thoughts.  It was Alma 25:16.

There is some lead up that needs to be done before delving into this scripture...The Lamanites have continued to convert with more of them burying their weapons and joining the people of Ammon.  Alma 25:15 talks about how they kept the Law of Moses even though they knew that Christ would be coming and that law would eventually pass away.  They kept it because the law hadn't passed away yet, but they didn't just keep it with mindless obedience.  They kept it "considering that the law of Moses was a type of [Christ's] coming, and believing that they must keep those outward performances until the time that he should be revealed unto them."

Alma 25:16 goes on to say:

"Now they did not suppose that salvation came by the law of Moses; but the law of Moses did serve to strengthen their faith in Christ; and thus they did retain a hope through faith, unto eternal salvation, relying upon the spirit of prophecy, which spake of those things to come."

So my version would go something like this:  Now she did not suppose that salvation came by the weekly meetings she attended, her official visiting teaching percentage, how ready her home was to receive visitors, or by how well her children behaved but that doing these things, or at least striving to do these things, did serve to strengthen her faith in Christ;  and thus she did retain a hope through faith, unto eternal salvation, relying upon the spirit.

A Clean Slate?

I am thinking once again about the people of Ammon and their commitment to Jesus Christ. Alma 24:15 says:

"...we have not stained our swords in the blood of our brethren since he imparted his word unto us and made us clean thereby."

That sentiment has a great appeal to me. The sentiment that says--there is a day of commitment that I can point to, and I haven't messed up since then. It is a sentiment I cannot echo and one that maybe I think about too much.

It can be depressing to try to keep a clean track record in everything. I suppose if I'm really going to compare myself, I should stick to the facts. They are talking about not killing people...so I've never done that. Nice job, Ambra. But really all I can see are the many things I resolve not to do again, but do them anyway like yelling, or gossiping, or procrastinating forming a Family Mission Plan like our stake president has asked us to.

I repent. I reset the start time. I count the minutes, hours, days that I make it without messing up. I put check marks next to the things on my list that mean I am a good obedient person. Why don't these things make me happy? Because I know they are fleeting and I will eventually mess up and I will NEVER be done with my list.

And so it goes. I keep trying. I keep feeling defeated as I fall short. How can I express thanks in my prayers for Jesus Christ's Atonement while completely ignoring what it means for me? Why do I let Satan's darts of discouragement lay me so flat that I don't feel like trying again?

Why do I think that I have to "turn in" a nearly clean slate each day and only cause the Savior a minimum of trouble because I really could do pretty much everything by myself?  I heard a talk recently that said: "Jesus doesn't make up the difference. Jesus makes all the difference." I think I need to rely a little more heavily on the Savior than have been lately. In fact, I'm sure of it.

Awestruck

Reading Alma 24 always leaves me in awe.

By this time in the Book of Mormon, the people of Ammon have distinguished themselves from the other Lamanites by changing their name to Anti-Nephi-Lehi and corresponding with the Nephites.  The other Lamanites, along with the Amalekites and Amulonites, decide they don't like how things are going.  They want a new king, and so they make preparations for war to go against the Anti-Nephi-Lehis.  The people of Ammon see this preparation and meet to decide what exactly they should do about it.  They conclude that they must bury their weapons.

It is a fact that escaped me as a child studying this Book of Mormon story--they buried their weapons when they knew a war was surely coming.  I had always thought that they buried their weapons when they were deciding to be baptized.  I thought it was part of the repentance process for them that was subsequently tested by their brethren's attack.  It is a marvel to me that they made the commitment even as their brethren made swords.

As I said, I am in awe.  And then--I can't seem to help myself--I wonder if it was worth it.  Was it necessary for them to lay before the coming army and be slaughtered?  Could they have defended themselves and still been faithful followers of Christ?  After all, the Nephites defend themselves through bloodshed all the time.  I don't know the answers to those questions, but I do know that they felt they could not sully the swords that Christ had so recently wiped clean from the many murders they had committed.  I also know that in Alma 23:6 it refers to these faithful people saying:

"...yea, I say unto you, as the Lord liveth, as many of the Lamanites as...were converted unto the Lord, never did fall away."
 

And, of course, we know that these same people were the parents of the 2,000 stripling warriors that fought with Helaman.

Perhaps there is something to be said about going above and beyond in our commitment to the gospel of Jesus Christ.

 

Pondering

In Alma 22, Aaron teaches King Lamoni's father, who is the king over all the Lamanites.  After Aaron has taught him many things, the king bows "down before the Lord upon his knees" and prays.  One of the things he says is this:

"I will give away all my sins to know thee"  (Alma 22:18)

I have been thinking about those words lately.  They humble and inspire me.  They are worth pondering I think.

Kindness is a Virtue

Alma 17:35 says:

"...therefore they delighted in the destruction of their brethren..."
 

It is referring to the Lamanites that scattered the flocks of King Lamoni.  The scripture tells us that the reason they "delighted" in doing this was because they knew nothing of the Lord.

Reading these words made me think of life in our current world.  Many do delight in the destruction of their brethren, even those who know of the Lord.  Most of us aren't attempting to actually destroy anyone, but sometimes I think it is our tendency to try to build ourselves up by ripping others down.  Sometimes we may even "delight" when someone who has wronged us meets with unpleasant circumstances.

The words of Alma 17:35 made me think of a time a few years ago when a neighbor told me of a divorce that was occurring among our acquaintances.  The husband had left his wife with four elementary aged children.  The eldest boy was the same age as the neighbor's son and one of my own children.  The boy had been cruel to her son and so she told the story of the family's troubles with relish, as if the boy deserved the tumult happening around him because of the misdeeds he had committed.  I remember at the time feeling rather sick inside and expressing my sympathy toward the family.  I could not share in her "delight."  My response did leave my neighbor feeling a bit chagrined, I think, but she wasn't yet ready to lay down her anger and replace it with forgiveness.

In 1937 President George Albert Smith said:

"I feel sad sometimes when I hear the unkind things that are spoken, not only of people in our Church, but of people in the world. Unkind things are not usually said under the inspiration of the Lord. The Spirit of the Lord is a spirit of kindness; it is a spirit of patience; it is a spirit of charity and love and forbearance and long suffering; and there are none of us who do not need all these virtues that are the result of the possession of the Spirit of our Heavenly Father."
 

I am not on my soap box preaching to those who are lowly around me.  I am reminding myself that we are all children of our Heavenly Father.  We ALL are.  We were placed on this lovely world together.  We can learn and grow together.  We can strive to understand instead of condemn.  We can love each other.

I know that, with the help of our Heavenly Father, we can love even those who seem unlovable.  I know that through Christ's Atonement we can receive divine help to forgive.  I know that ripping others down does not boost us up.  If we wish to feel good about ourselves, we need only to pray, for Heavenly Father loves us and our Savior feels we are worth the great price that He paid.

Strength According to Our Faith

Since starting this blog, I have noticed how much personal guidance I receive during my scripture reading.  Not personal, as in secret, but personal as in many of my thoughts wouldn't apply to others.  It is often answers to questions I have posed regarding my life.  I have also noticed that it is much more time consuming to write a post that is (hopefully) understood by others than it is to jot a few notes in my scripture journal.  For both reasons I haven't posted anything for a while.  But, although driving kids to seminary has been inserted into my morning routine, I would like to get back on track with this blog.  I'm thinking maybe a couple of posts a week.  It is kind of nice for me to be forced to express my thoughts so that others can understand them. 

Enough about that...

In Alma 14, Alma and Amulek are in prison.  They have been roughly treated and made to watch those who believe in Christ killed.  The believers are burned along with their "sacred records."

After enduring much, Alma 14:26-28 tells us this:

"And Alma cried, saying:  How long shall we suffer these great afflictions, O Lord?  O Lord, give us strength according to our faith which is in Christ, even unto deliverance.  And they broke the cords with which they were bound...and the earth shook mightily, and the walls of the prison were rent in twain, so that they fell to the earth...and Alma and Amulek came forth out of the prison, and they were not hurt; for the Lord had granted them power, according to their faith which was in Christ..."
 

As I read this account recently, it struck me that the language is similar to that of 1 Nephi 7:17 which says:

"...O Lord, according to my faith which is in thee, wilt thou deliver me from the hands of my brethren; yea, even give me strength that I may burst these bands with which I am bound."
 

I had never noticed before how, in each of these instances, power/strength was granted according to the faith of the one asking.  And not just according to their faith, but more specifically, it was according to their faith in Christ.  This might seem a very small thing, but to me it isn't.

I have always been told to pray in faith.  That faith and doubt cannot both exist at the same time.  It made me wonder how I could get such faith in things I was unsure of.  For example, how do I pray in faith that I would get into the college I wanted?  How can I eradicate all doubt about something like that?  To me--praying in faith sounded like it required a super-sized ego, or at the very least a small departure from reality.  But the thing we are praying about is not what we are asked not to doubt. We are asked to pray with faith in Christ and our Father in Heaven.  I can do that.  I can know that they hear me, that they listen and care.  Whether I receive what I am asking for is not what is most important (although it really did seem that way when I was praying about college.)  What is most important is my relationship with my Heavenly Father and my Savior.

Finally, finally, years later another gospel question of mine has been answered.  I finally get it.  I must admit that at times I feel rather slow, but I guess what really matters is that I didn't let my failure to understand stop me from doing the best I could with the knowledge I had.

When There Are Wolves, Stay Close to the Shepard

Alma 5 is a chapter full of Alma' words to the people of Zarahemla.  He has given the job of Chief Judge to another so that he, as High Priest in the church, can have time to travel and preach the word of God.  He is trying to offset the damage done by a man named Nehor, who preached false doctrine and caused many to fall away from the church.

In Alma 5:60, Alma says:

"...if you will hearken unto his voice he will bring you into his fold, and ye are his sheep; and he commandeth you that ye suffer no ravenous wolf to enter among you, that ye may not be destroyed."

He, of course, is talking about becoming part of the fold of Jesus Christ and how that protects us from people like Nehor.  If you are listening to Christ's voice, you will not be taken in by other voices that will destroy you spiritually.

It made me think of other things that can be "ravenous wolves" in our lives.  Being a stay-at-home mom I have noticed that I have less outside influences on me than at other times in my life, such as when I was in school or going to work daily.  This particular time in life is kind of nice that way.  And yet, lately I have been feeling the pull of so many different things on my time that I feel as though I may come apart.  I have felt that I don't have time for the little things I love like a big chunk of time to study scriptures, a bedtime book shared with the kids, or a long talk with my husband about an interesting book.  These things may get done some days, but they have felt rushed and so the joy in them is diminished.  I don't want to feel pulled apart.  I am not fighting really bad influences like priestcrafts, but just the pace of my modern life as a mother, wife, daughter, friend, visiting teacher, PTO Treasurer, writer, aunt, sister, Relief Society counselor, and on and on.

It was said to me this week that we can always do more.  That is so true.  People will ask it, I will demand it of myself, and I will never be able to do it all.  There will always be more.  So, I think a re-evaluation is in order.  I think I need to sit quietly and seek to listen to the voice of my Savior who loves me.  I need to seek for guidance on balancing all these good things in life so that they do not become the ravenous wolves that I allow to tear me away from that which truly matters.

I am very grateful for Alma's words this morning.

Yoked

Alma 1:26 says:  "...for the preacher is no better than the hearer, neither was the teacher any better than the learner; and thus they were all equal, and they did all labor, every man according to his strength."

I like that scripture a lot.  It makes me feel like we are all in this together, striving to do our part.

What makes me feel even better is knowing that when we feel like all our striving and pushing and pulling isn't getting it done, we can remember that we can choose to take upon our shoulders a yoke that also rests upon the shoulders of the Savior.  In this we can find rest.

"Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart:  and ye shall find rest unto your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."  Matt. 11:28-30

Kings and Contracts

In Mosiah 29:30 it says:  "ye have no king; that if these people commit sins and iniquities they shall be answered upon their own heads."

It is interesting to me...this answered on whose head business.  Lehi blessed his grandchildren, the sons and daughters of Laman and Lemuel, that their sins would be answered upon the heads of their fathers because he was sure if they were taught correctly that they would follow the commandments.  I'm glad I'm not the one judging everything--that is definitely a job for an omnipotent being.  But I do know that I need to teach my children about the gospel so that I know I have provided them with the tools to make right choices.  I tell them that sometimes when they are looking at me like 'Yeah, Mom, we've heard it before.'  I tell them that teaching them certain things is a requirement for parenting.  It's found in Clause A, paragraph 2 of the contract they made me sign before leaving the hospital with them.

I have referenced the Parenting Contract since Kimball was very little and didn't want his finger nails cut or his hair combed.  At first he believed me.  He thought that I had agreed to a pretty hefty list of stuff before being able to walk out the hospital doors with him.  He and the other kids have since figured out that I'm joking about the contract, but not about what I'm telling them needs doing.  They know that when I bring up the contract, whatever I'm talking about is not on the table for discussion, and they should stop all negotiations for the sake of saving time.

I am grateful that we don't have a king, but freedom does mean that I have a pretty good-sized chunk of responsibility for what goes on in my home.  It weighs heavy at times.  So heavy that sometimes, especially around bedtime, I forget about Section 1, paragraph 1 of my contract:  'I agree to love these children in such a manner as to allow them no doubts in their minds of said love.  I will be the shoulder they can lean on and the touchstone they require no matter how tired or busy I feel.  And, I will honor this most important paragraph as I endeavor to sort out the many additional lines of this imaginary and ever changing contract for as long as I can keep a thought in my head.'  (Did you notice the built in loop-hole?  All contracts have them and, as many of my friends can attest to, sometimes I truly cannot keep a thought in my head.)

I suppose this particular post is an example of the fact that sometimes I get off track as I try to follow the advice to liken the scriptures to my own life.  My apologies.

Reminder to Me

Life this summer has become overwhelmingly busy.  As I watched my gospel study time become diverted away from the actual scriptures into other important, but not vital, things I have felt the loss.  It is amazing to me how reading other gospel centered things for lessons doesn't quite give me the same peace and guidance that reading in the scriptures does.  It seems there really is nothing that can replace in my life the pure and simple pleasure of being able to spend time with the scriptures.  I'm so grateful that I live in this time in history that we each can have the scriptures in our home, at our fingertips, and available to us each and every day!

I'm grateful for the example of Alma the Younger.  As I read of him being High Priest in the church and Chief Judge over the Nephites (Mosiah 29:42), my meager responsibilities don't feel quite so heavy.  Why is it that I so often forget that when I feel that my time is crunched, it is then that it is most vital for me to open my scriptures and read?

Mosiah 29:7

As I thought yesterday about giving my children confidence in themselves a favorite scripture came to mind.  Doctrine and Covenants 121:45-46 says:

"Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distil upon they soul as the dews from heaven.  The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever."

I think that scripture is another thing I need to remember when worrying about what is most important for my kids.  And, I need to remember that I'm in good company when I worry.  I noticed recently that King Mosiah worried about whether his son Aaron, who was heir to the throne, had truly had a lasting change of heart.  He worried that someday he might turn back to his wicked ways and demand the throne once again.  Aaron actually became a wonderfully devoted and successful missionary to the Lamanites, but his father still worried a little and it was one reason he gave for establishing judges as rulers of the people of Nephi.  In Mosiah 29:7 he says:

"And now if there should be another appointed in his stead, behold I fear there would rise contentions among you.  And who knoweth but what my son, to whom the kingdom doth belong, should turn to be angry and draw away a part of this people after him, which would cause wars and contentions among you, which would be the cause of shedding much blood and perverting the way of the Lord, yea, and destroy the souls of many people."

As my little niece said yesterday, "Parenting is hard work."  I'm very grateful that I have the scriptures to help me.

Time Out

I found this quote wherein President Hinckley is encouraging us to "constantly nourish the testimony of our people concerning the Savior...[and to instill] a true witness in [each] heart of the living reality of the Lord Jesus Christ, all else will come together as it should." Ensign, August 1997, p.3

Being newly called into the Relief Society presidency, I thought of the sisters of our ward, I thought of my family, and I thought of myself.

I cherish this guidance and hope that I can remember it as I am floundering and fussing over what is to be done when day seems full to bursting with plans and there is not enough time for everything, nor any way to solve all the problems at hand.  I need to remember what is important and choose wisely as to where my time is spent.  I need to remember, and let peace enter my heart knowing that if I am striving to nourish a testimony of the Savior in myself and those around me that "all else will come together as it should."

Sometimes I want proof of that.  I want to call a time out, visit heaven for a bit and look down here with a new perspective.  I want it to be just long enough that I can nod my head, smile, and say, "Yep, some of that stuff just doesn't matter a whole lot."  I want to see exactly what those things are.  Some of the things I used to think were less important matter more than I realized, and yet I wonder if eternally they truly are of less importance.  Like children's activities for example--as a young mom, they were a big deal.  Then, I saw that they weren't that important.  Now, I can see that children gain confidence as they improve themselves...which matters.  But, does that mean that some of my kids that aren't involved in much are missing out on a huge piece of life?  I don't know...I need a time out.

His Spirit

I remember once, during a temple recommend interview, chatting with President Hawkins.  Upon hearing that Mat had joined the church while we were dating, he asked, "So did you convert him?"

"No," I answered, "the Spirit did."

He looked at me as if to check if I was being cute with him.  I was completely serious.

The Holy Ghost being present in our relationships with others is so important, especially within our families.

Something I read in The Teachings of the Presidents of the Church: George Albert Smith reminded me of this.  President Smith said:

"What a lovely thing it was to me when I was a child to have a father and mother sit down by the fireplace and read the Bible while we children sat on the floor..." (pg. 108)

Upon reading that passage, I thought of our scripture reading of late.  Mat has been absent much of the time and the kids have been merely enduring it.  There have been some spiritual moments with the whole family but not many.  I thought to myself how I wished that I possessed the spirit President Smith's parents had so that my children would feel like scripture reading was "a lovely thing."  Then, I realized I could.  In fact, that very spirit was with me now, conveying that realization to me.  It was the spirit of the Lord that President Smith's parents invited into their home, and I can do the same.  It was not their spirit, nor can it be my spirit that makes scripture reading "lovely," it is His Spirit, and it is available to us all.

Mosiah 25

Mosiah 25 is the chapter that establishes the Nephites and Lamanites again as the two main peoples referred to in the Book of Mormon.  Splitting off had occurred way back in Omni when Zeniff and his people left.  But now, King Limhi and his people, along with Ammon, are back in Zarahemla as are Alma and those who followed him.  (These two groups are both descendants of the Zeniff group.) They along with the Nephites that remained in Zarahemla and the Mulekites that built Zarahemla are now joined together and referred to as Nephites.  Mosiah 25:13 says:

"And now all the people of Zarahemla were numbered with the Nephites, and this because the kingdom had been conferred upon none but those who were descendants of Nephi."

Then, Alma establishes the church among the people and baptizes many people.  And so, the way that I normally think of the people in the Book of Mormon is set up...There are Nephites and Lamanites (much more Lamaites than Nephites).  And there is a leader of the church in the land--Alma.

Faith, Hope, and Charity

One of the most marvelous things about taking the time to earnestly study the scriptures is that I learn from the spirit throughout my day so much more than when I let my scripture study slacken.

One morning, I learned about faith in the Lord Jesus Christ while carrying laundry to my sons' room and listening to the theme song to Clifford the Big Red Dog as it entertained Josie.  In the song it says:

"Clifford needed Emily, so she chose him for her own, and her love made Clifford grow so big that the Howards had to leave their home."

I thought to myself that if I were a very little child and didn't know better, I might falsely believe that if I loved my dog enough, I could make him grow as big as Clifford.  Then, because such a thing can't happen, I would be disappointed and might even feel that I had done something wrong.  I might conclude that if I had raised my dog right, he would have grown to be a giant.  This is like putting your faith in something other than Jesus Christ, like for example, believing that if I had faith enough in myself, I could overcome all my weakness alone.  This is not so (Moses 1:10).  It is not faith in myself that will cause a real transformation from weakness to strength.  Believing such a thing would almost be like believing that love can tranform a tiny puppy into a dog that is larger than a house.

That Wednesday morning, the spirit turned a child's cartoon into a teaching moment, and suddenly, I understood what years of repeating the fourth Article of Faith had failed to get through to me.  It is not simply the concept of faith that is so important, it is "faith in the Lord Jesus Christ" that is essential.

I learned about hope from the spirit years later, also from an unexpected place.  It came in the form of a book written for children by Lloyd Alexander called The Black Cauldron.  In this book, the hero, Taran, and his friends have been captured and have been told their demise is eminent.  They are told they will be thrown into the crochan (or black cauldron) which will turn them into living dead warriors.  Taran and his friend, Fflewddur Fflam, have this conversation:

"He will not succeed in this," Taran said.  "Somehow, we must find a way to escape.  We dare not lose hope."

"I agree absolutely,"  Fflewddur answered.  "Your general idea is excellent; it's only the details that are lacking.  Lose hope?  By no means!  A Fflam is always hopeful!  I intend to go on hoping," he added ruefully, "even when they come and pop me into the Crochan."

I recognized myself in Fflewddur's words.  I try to convince myself I have hope because hope is one of the big three--no, boys, not Zeus, Poseiden, and Hades.  I mean the big three that you really need to have in order to gain eternal life--faith, hope, and charity (1 Corithians 13).

For me, Paul's counsel to hope has always seemed a bit like Taran's--very general and lacking in detail.  I, like Fflewddur, might at times insist I have hope, even though I still feel the inevitabilities of life telling me that I can't possibly become what I want to become.  I, who am so imperfect, can't possibly hope to live with my Father in Heaven again.  But, as I thought about Fflewddur's statement I realized I felt that way only because I wasn't putting my hope in Christ.  Hope seemed very abstract to me and somewhat difficult to understand until I realized that I trust Jesus Christ completely to do what he says he'll do.  He is here, his arms outstretched in mercy and grace.  He lived as a great example, he conquered the grave and was resurrected, and, most amazingly of all, he suffered for all our sins that we might not have to suffer--he performed an infinite and eternal Atonement for mankind. 

It was hard to do, even for him, but he truly did it.  And, now, he has every right to offer us hope.  Our part in it is to keep his commandments and humble ourselves enough to call on him and learn to use the Atonement.  That is real hope--specific, spelled out, and hard won.

Charity is a wonderful thing, and I don't have an excellent grasp on it, but I caught a glimpse of it the other day in the temple.  I think the key to charity is to love God with all your heart.  I think loving Heavenly Father helps us to love others because we are the beneficiaries of our love for him--it sounds backwards, I know.  But, if we love him, we have his spirit always with us.  We have someone who is always there for us and that knowledge helps us to love others and be there for them.

My Eben-ezer

Lately, around the house, my husband has been whistling Come Thou Font of Every Blessing.  I love it!  It reminds me of when I was going to school at Ricks College.  I volunteered in a nursing home with some really fun guys that always went aroung humming hymns.

If you've never heard it sung by the Tabernacle Choir, it's on youtube.  It is a very pretty hymn, but one part puzzled me because I had no idea what an Ebenezer was except when referring to a man named Scrooge.  The stanza says:

"Here I raise mine Ebenezer;
hither by thy help I'm come;
and I hope, by thy good pleasure,
safely to arrive at home.
Jesus sought me when a stranger,
wandering from the fold of God;
he, to rescue me from danger,
interposed his precious blood."

I looked up Ebenezer in the Bible Dictionary.  The definition says:

"Stone of help.  A stone set up by Samuel as a token of gratitutde for deliverance from the Philistines."

I thought it was interesting because I had just written about deliverence through divine help in my blog.  My blog that I started because one day I was studying the scriptures and felt such an overwhelming feeling of gratitude and excitement over what the Spirit was teaching me I just had to share it.  Yep--I suppose if one were to accept a loose translation of the word you could call this blog my Ebenezer.

Mosiah 21 and 22

When reading the story of how King Limhi and his people escape the Lamanites this last week, I suddenly saw it differently.  I was able to liken it to my life more clearly than I had been able to before.

Mosiah 21:5 says:

"...there was no way that they could deliver themselves out of their hands, for the Lamanites had surrounded them on every side."

In my scriptures I circled the word Lamanites and wrote in the margin--sins or afflictions.  Sometimes it feels like I am surrounded on every side by imperfections and afflictions, either caused by my own sins or by circumstances beyond my control.

The people of King Limhi, finding themselves surrounded, decided to go to war against the Lamanites.  I too have headed into the fray in the attempt to conquer all that has troubled me.  Limhi's people were defeated.  Three times in a row.  I too often feel as though I have lost the battle.

In Mosiah 21:14 something changes for the people of Limhi, it says:

"And they did humble themselves even in the depths of humility; and they did cry mightily to God; yea, even all the day long did they cry unto their God that he would deliver them out of their afflictions."

Why do I so often forget that Christ's Atonement is always there with real and true power waiting to be called upon?  Whether it be sin, affliction, sorrow, the need to forgive someone or be forgiven Christ has provided for us an infinite Atonement.

The Lord sends Ammon, and those with him, to help Limhi's people.  The people experience "exceedingly great joy." (v.24)  The Lord can also turn my frustrations into joy.

The people of Limhi come up with a plan and act.  With the help of Ammon and his brethren, they get the Lamanite guards drunk and escape into the night with all their people, flocks, and herds.  It says in Mosiah 22:16 that the Lamanites try to follow them, but lose their tracks after two days.  They lost the tracks of a whole village traveling with flocks and herds?  Sounds like divine intervention to me. 

I know the Lord will also intervene to help me escape from those things which surround me if I will humble myselves like the people of Limhi and pray "mightily."  I need to follow that humility with faith to act on promptings both big and small.  I need to be willing to leave behind that which would hinder my escape and always keep a prayer in my heart.

Mosiah 18:10

I like Alma's simple way of explaining why someone would want to get baptized.  In Mosiah 18:10, he asks his followers:

"...what have you against being baptized in the name of the Lord, as a witness before him that ye have entered into a covenant with him, that ye will serve him and keep his commandments, that he may pour out his Spirit more abundantly upon you?"

It says his followers actually clapped their hands with joy and proclaimed their desire to be baptized.

I like their enthusiasm.  I hope I can have some of that as I renew my baptismal covenant each week by taking the sacrament.

Our Suffering Might Not Be

I have been thinking much lately about the Atonement.  When Abinadi is standing before King Noah, he tells them that he will not be taken before he has said all that Heavenly Father wants him to say and he speaks much of the Savior, his Atonement, and the resurrection.

He teaches us in Mosiah 16:10-11 that all will be resurrected and judged according to what we have become during this life:

"Even this mortal shall put on immortality and this corruption shall put on incorruption, and shall be brought to stand before the bar of God, to be judged of him according to their works whether they be good or whether they be evil--If they be good, to the resurrection of endless life and happiness; and if they be evil, to the resurrection of endless damnation, being delivered up to the devil, who hath subjected them, which is damnation."

I have been thinking much lately of the choice that needs to be made.  Will I forsake the sins that so easily beset me?  The word 'forsake' seems to capture the necessary feeling best.  I need to not only refrain from committing my 'favorite' sins, but I need to turn my back of even the desire to do them.

Kenneth Cope is the composer that wrote Women at the Well.  A line from one of those songs has periodically been running through my mind this past week.  In Miracle from Heaven it says:

                                          "He has drenched Himself in our suffering

                                           That our suffering might not be..."

It is the words "might not be" that have really caught me attention.  I heard them soon after reading Mosiah 16:12 which says:

"...for the arms of mercy were extended towards them, and they would not; they being warned of their iniquities and yet they would not depart from them..."

I know that the consequences of my sins cause me pain now.  So it is not only the next life I am thinking of when I remember that the Savior is there, arms extended, waiting for me to hand him my burden and trust that he has the power to take it upon himself--in fact, has already taken it upon himself.  My refusal to acknowledge and use his great gift would be like insisting on paying my mortgage payment every month even though a kind benefactor has already, though great hardship on himself, paid for my house in full.

My suffering "might not be," but only if I, with faith and hope in the Savior, acknowledge the gift of the Atonement and use it.

Mosiah 14 and 15

Mosiah 14:10 reads:

"Yet it pleased the Lord to bruise him; he hath put him to grief; when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the Lord shall prosper in his hand."

This is talking about Jesus Christ and his Atonement.  Abinadi is quoting Isaiah.  In chapter 15, Abinadi explains this to the wicked priests of King Noah.  In Mosiah 15:10 he asks:

"...And who shall be his seed?"

In Mosiah 15:11, he answers the question:

"Behold I say unto you, that whosoever has heard the words of the prophets, yea, all the holy prophets who have prophesied concerning the coming of the Lord--I say unto you, that all those who have hearkened unto their words, and believed that the Lord would redeem his people, and have looked forward to that day for a remission of their sins, I say unto you, that these are his seed, or they are the heirs of the kingdom of God."

Isaiah can be confusing sometimes, and I love when the Book of Mormon prophets explain things.

We Are All Lost Sheep

Mosiah 14:6 says:

"All we, like sheep, have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquities of us all."

Michael McLean, the author/composer who wrote the Forgotten Carols, has a song called "Ninety and Nine" in which he sings--

I'm one of the ninety and nine                          

I'm not perfect but basically I'm doing fine     

I have not lost my way, I have not gone astray

I'm just one of the ninety and nine.                  

I do like this song and, because I saw him at Time Out for Women, I know he wrote this song for his Sunday School class full of good teenagers, people who hadn't experienced much of life's ups and downs yet.  The song goes on to say that the Savior reaches out for us all, even those safely in the fold.  All that said, I don't really like the part where it implies we can "do fine" on our own.  The scriptures make it abundantly clear that there is no other way to exaltation, except through Christ.  We cannot go to church, hold our ward calling, basically stay out of trouble and call it good.  I think that would be striving to gain exaltation through our works alone.  We NEED the Savior.  We all need him.  The need for him and his Atonement in our lives is basic and essential, it is not only set in place for those people who are really serious sinners. 

Christ's Atonement is amazing.  It allows me to be forgiven as well as makes is possible for me to forgive.  I have a personal testimony that utilizing the Atonement in both ways can bring about miraculous results.

Mosiah 11-14

In Mosiah 11, King Noah's rule begins.  He leads the people into idolatry and in general earns the title "wicked."  This is one of the "storytelling chapters" as I think of them.  I don't know if you've noticed, but there are chapters in the Book of Mormon that tell stories and there are chapters that are almost pure doctrine, and then there are, of course, the chapters that have both.

Mosiah 12 and 13 have both as Abinadi comes on the scene and preaches to the king and his priests about the Ten Commandments.  Then, Mosiah 14 is an Isaiah chapter.  Abinadi begins to teach about Christ in the end of chapter 13 and then, although it doesn't specifically say it, I'm thinking Abinadi quotes Isaiah to them.  Interestingly, the priests quoted Isaiah to Abinadi in Mosiah 12:21-24 showing that they know the scriptures even if they, as Abinadi puts it, "have not applied [their] hearts to understanding" (Mosiah 12:27) them.

By quoting Isaiah, Abinadi is trying to point out that the wicked priests should understand that "salvation doth not come by the law alone." (Mosiah 13:28)  He is reminding them about the greatness of the Atonement.  And I must say, Isaiah does get the job done.

Mosiah 14/Isaiah 53 is a beautiful chapter speaking about what the Savior has done for us.  I feel overwhelming gratitude when I read Mosiah 14:5:

"But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed."

I think 'chastisement of our peace' is referring to our guilt.  It's a great way to describe how guilt effects me anyway.  How odd and hard it must have been for the Savior, who had never sinned, to feel what that is like.

Reading that scripture makes me want to get down to the business of repenting.  It reminds me that Christ has already suffered so that I don't have to.  My anger, hurt, resentment, and guilt can all be taken away if I am humble and willing to take advantage of Christ's most marvelous gift of the Atonement.

The Record of Zeniff

Before Mosiah 9 begins there is a note that states chapters 9-22 are from the Record of Zeniff.  I somehow failed to comprehend this my first few times through the Book of Mormon which made for very confusing reading.  I wasn't too confused while reading one chapter a day, it wasn't until after I would finish this portion of the Book of Mormon that I would think back and wonder how everyone was connected and how on earth did the people go from being led by King Benjamin to being led by wicked King Noah so quickly? (Which is completely wrong thinking, by the way, King Benjamin's people are never ruled by King Noah...thought I'd clarify just in case.)

These are things I didn't comprehend until I started reading bigger chunks at a time, and my clarity was helped even more by that article I mention from the Ensign called The Mulekites.  Anyway, that being said, I do understand how this all fits together now.

Mosiah chapter 9 is taking us back to when, in the Book of Omni, Amaleki mentions "a certain number who went up into the wilderness to return to the land of Nephi."  Zeniff, who had been a spy among the Lamanites, decided he would rather join them than beat them.  He was the leader of the those who went up to try to live peaceably in the land of their fathers.  Mosiah 9 tells how the king of the Lamanites, King Laman, gave Zeniff and his people the land of Lehi-Nephi and the land of Shiblom.  The king commanded that his people leave and make room for Zeniff's people.  Now, I can't help but think this scenario might have been recognized as too good to be true, but then, hindsight is 20/20.

Zeniff writes that "it was the cunning and the craftiness of king Laman, to bring my people into bondage, that he yielded up the land that we might possess it."  The people of Zeniff were in the land for twelve years before the Lamanites messed with them, and when the first big war happened, Zeniff records that his people went to battle "in the strength of the Lord...and in one day and a night we did slay three thousand and forty-three; we did slay them even until we had driven them out of our land."  Zeniff only lost 279 of his brothren.

Mosiah 10 explains why the Lamanites hate all Nephites so much and tells of another war fought and won because Zeniff and his people trusted in the Lord.  Then, Zeniff confers the kingdom on one of his sons.  My question is:  If he had more than one son, why did he choose Noah?  I am burning with curiosity to know the answer.  I mean, Zeniff seems to be a pretty decent guy.  I like him.  I can't say I admire him, but he writes so plainly of his flaws and mistakes as well as aspirations and strengths that he seems so very human.  He conveys so much about his life in so short a time.  Two chapters--that's it.  Then he is conferring the kingdom on one of the worst king's in the Book of Mormon.  It doesn't say Noah was the eldest son, but maybe the answer is as simple as that.  Whatever the reason, the choice turned out to be a very poor one indeed.

Mosiah 8:18

In Mosiah chapters 7 & 8, we are told the story of how Ammon (the Mulekite) finds King Limhi and the people of Lehi-Nephi.  We are told King Limhi is happy to see them and that he sent a search party to find the people of Zarahemla, but their searching had only produced a land where the people had been totally wiped out.  They had found plates there, but could not translate them.  Ammon tells them that Mosiah is a prophet and seer and will be able to traslate it for them.  In Mosiah 8:18 Ammon says:

"Thus God has provided a means that man, through faith, might work mighty miracles; therefore he becometh a great benefit to his fellow beings."

He is speaking of King Mosiah and prophets in general, but I really like the idea of becoming a great benefit to my fellow beings--even if my circle of influence is small when compared to that of a prophet.  I think that would be a good thing to strive for...to be a benefit to those around me.

Take Upon You the Name of Christ

Mosiah 5 talks about how the people experienced a might change of heart after hearing King Benjamin's words.  They said, in verse 5, "we are willing to enter into a covenant with our God to do his will, and to be obedient to his commandments in all things..."  King Benjamin responds by calling them "the children of Christ" (v.7) and saying, in verse 8, "...I would that that ye should take upon you the name of Christ, all you that have entered into the covenant with God that ye should be obedient unto the end of your lives."

It brings to mind the prayer we hear each Sunday during the sacrament:

"O God, the Eternal Father, we ask thee in the name of thy Son, Jesus Christ, to bless and sanctify this bread to the souls of all those who partake of it, that they may eat in remembrance of the body of thy Son, and witness unto thee, O God, the Eternal Father, that they are willing to take upon them the name of thy Son, and always remember him and keep his commandments which he has given them; that they may always have his Spirit to be with them.  Amen." (Doctrine and Covenants 20:77)

We take upon us the name of Christ when we choose to be baptized.  We are reminded of this each week as we take the sacrament, so I think King Benjamin's words in Mosiah 5:9 apply to us as well as his people.  He says:

"And it shall come to pass that whosoever doeth this (enter into the covenant) shall be found at the right hand of God, for he shall know the name by which he is called; for he shall be called by the name of Christ."

Now, of course, it is not just entering into the covenant that matters, but keeping the covenant.  The real thing that struck me today is in verses 12 and 13:

"...that ye hear and know the voice by which ye shall be called, and also, the name by which he shall call you.  For how knoweth a man the master whom he has not served..."

For some reason, I got an image in my mind of waiting in a crowd of people in heaven and actually being called out of the crowd with words like--"Those of you who are the children of Christ, please come this way."  Now, I want to make clear that I do not think that was a revelation of how things will be, but it got me thinking about the fact that in that scenario it would be up to me to decide if I qualified as someone who had taken Christ's name upon me.  I think that is important.  I have often felt that death and what comes after would be more like sending in an application for college.  You work hard and study all through school, you do extra-curricular activities, you list your qualifications with a hopeful heart, and then you send it in and wait anxiously to hear if you have been accepted.  You wonder if you are good enough.  I don't think that is how it is.  We should know whether we are 'good enough' to be found at the right hand of God.  We should be aware if we will know the voice by which we are called.

Many of the prophets in the Book of Mormon write with confidence that they will be with Heavenly Father and Christ soon.  They are sure they have earned their eternal reward.  I always assumed that was more of a "prophet thing," but wouldn't it be lovely if we could all have that?  I know that I have some work to do before I feel that way, but I know I'm closer than I used to be.  I suppose that is a step in the right direction.  The Atonement is the key.  Repentance and forgiveness are such blessings!  I also know I need to focus on that phrase "full purpose of heart." (Mosiah 7:33)

Mosiah 4

In Mosiah 4:30, King Benjamin advises "...watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds..."

I have truly discovered that it is much easier to watch our words and deeds if we are vigilant with our thoughts.  It is very hard to treat people the way we should if we are thinking bad things about them.  This may seem like a no brainer, but I remember in high school deciding that I wouldn't say bad things about others.  To make up for the lack of spoken word, it seemed as though my thoughts got meaner for a time.  I can remember they were down right poisonous toward one person.  I would hurled mean thoughts at her, thinking that as long as I didn't "say" it, that it was acceptable.  I found it very difficult to be around this person until I realized that my thoughts needed changing as well as my words.  What a relief it was to dicover how much easier it is to be kind in word and deed when I started controlling my thoughts instead of sweating bullets trying not to blurt out the mean things running through my mind.

Mosiah 3

In Mosiah 3, King Benjamin relates to his people, and us, a visit he had from an angel.  The angel brought "glad tiding of great joy." (v. 3)  King Benjamin was told by the angel a little of Christ's birth, life, death, and resurrection.  He was told much of what meaning Christ's Atonement has to us here on Earth.  In short, it means everything.  Christ is the way, the only way back to our Heavenly Father.

Through the Atonement, those ignorant of God's will and also little children are saved, as stated in verses 11 and 16.  This doctrine is different than many beliefs held by other christian faiths.  It is a doctrine that often gets me thinking of how the Lord works.  It is a piece of doctrine that I'm very glad to know.

Through the Atonement. we--who do know of God's commandments--can repent and receive mercy.  We can have faith in Jesus Christ and partake of his grace.  I have known for a long time that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ love us, and I used to wonder, when I was young, why I was always hearing from society, Hollywood, and even quoted scripture how Heavenly Father was always damning people to hell in a lake of fire and brimstone.  It is scriptures like Mosiah 3:25 that have helped me to better understand.  It says:

"And if they be evil they are consigned to an awful view of their own guilt and abominations, which doth cause them to shrink from the presence of the Lord into a state of misery and endless torment, from whence they can no more return; therefore they have drunk damnation to their own souls."

I added the italics because it is not Heavenly Father damning, or stopping our eternal progression, it is us.  It is how things work.  It is how things are.  Here on this Earth, you can't aim your car at a tree and expect to continue traveling down the road safely.  No, you aim for the tree and you will crash into it and experience an abrupt halt to your journey's progress.  I believe it is the laws of physics that would be involved in the tree scenario, where it is God's laws and plan that are followed during our eternal journey.  He has a wonderful plan of happiness for us, but in no way can it be followed if we do not look to Christ for guidence and forgiveness.  We can not aim our attention elsewhere and expect to continue on the path our Father in heaven has laid out for us.

Mosiah 1 and 2

King Benjamin is a wonderful scripture hero.  I always thought of this king's rein as it is described in Mosiah 1:1 "...king Benjamin had continual peace all the remainder of his days."

It took me a while to noticed the last part of Works of Mormon where it describes all King Benjamin did to get there.  There was contentions at home and war with the Lamanites.  There were false Christs, false prophets, and false preachers in the land.  He dealt with each situation.  He fought valiantly with the sword of Laban, when need be, and worked with other righteous men to preach the gospel and establish peace in the land.

King Benjamin's address begins in Mosiah 2 and is a wonderful treasure trove of spiritual truths.  As I read this morning, the themes of Be Humble and Be Grateful stood out to me, and as always the message of service was loud and clear.  King Benjamin is definitely a great example of service.  He lets us in on the key to serving with gladness, even when it is hard to serve, in Mosiah 2:17 when he says:

"And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of you fellow beings ye are only in the service of you God."

It is a well-known, often quoted scripture. It is a scripture that I memorized when I was a teen-age seminary student.  But memorizing is a different thing than truly taking a lesson into our hearts, and this lesson will only benefits us if we can put it into practice no matter what is asked of us.  In the church, and in life too, we are not always called upon to do things that we are good at.  It can be very difficult to labor in a challenging calling, but if we strive to serve as the Lord would have us to, if we pray and ask for help, he will help us serve faithfully and well.  Knowing that we are serving him well can help us find joy in the service, and then the service that was once so hard is no longer a drudgery.

I do want to add one disclaimer here.  I have spent most of my life seeking to serve (and I'm not referring to callings in the Church here, but everyday service) in ways that were hard and burdensome because I thought that only when I was really challenged and put out was I giving "real" service.  As a mother of young kids, this became very stressful for me.  To the point that I felt like giving up because I decided I just couldn't do it all anymore.  This is called trying to "run faster than you are able," and it is not advised.  We all have different talents and believe it or not your talents are needed.  You can give service in small ways that bring real pleasure every day.  It is not just the bringing of meals and the helping to move, pack, or clean for others that is service.  I found a smile and kind word of understanding to be a much needed thing among my daily rushings to and fro.  A listening ear is often all a person needs when they are struggling.  A card or email can work wonders for a friend.  These things are easy for me to give, and I so enjoy doing them that it makes my load for the day lighter, even when the listening ear may have taken a good chunk of my day, I feel better having given it.  (Which could possibly be why I am so abysmal at getting tasks on my 'to do' list accomplished.)  I would just like to say, be prayerful as you fill your day.  Heavenly Father will help you know that which is most important for you.

The Words of Mormon

I am in awe of Mormon.  To me, he is simply amazing.  What a task to be given, to abridge all those plates.  What a hard time in history to be striving to be righteous and do what Heavenly Father asks.  Mormon is one of those people I think of when people talk about how wicked the world is right now, and how hard it is to be righteous.  I think of Mormon and Moroni and their family living as the Nephites turned to wickedness and were destroyed.  I also think of Noah and his family working on the ark day after day, living righteously while everyone around them were not keeping the Lord's commandments.  I think of them, and then I figure that living in this last dispensation isn't so bad.

In this chapter, Mormon tells us that he has already made "an abridgement from the plates of Nephi, down to the reign of this king Benjamin, of whom Amaleki spake"(v.3)  when he found the small plates of Nephi and decided to include them even though they cover the same time period which he has just finished abridging. He says he is including them because it appeals to him that they contain the prophecies of the coming of Christ that his fathers know have already been fulfilled.  He writes that he will "take the remainder of [his] record...from the plates of Nephi" and continue the abridging process, but these plates he is just going to keep in his records as is.  In verse 7 he says:

"And I do this for a wise purpose; for thus it whispereth me, according to the workings of the Spirit of the Lord which is in me.  And now, I do not know all things; but the Lord knoweth all things which are to come; wherefore, he worketh in me to do according to his will."

This is very much like what Nephi said about the small plates when he wrote them--I don't exactly know why I'm doing this, but the Lord wants me to, so I will.  We, of course, know why.  We know the story of the 116 pages that were lost by Martin Harris and were not retranslated because Joseph Smith was told by the Lord not to do so.  Because these prophets obeyed, we still have the stories of Lehi's family, the Tree of Life and others.

I am so grateful for the example of these faithful men.  They are a wonderful example to me of the importance of following the promptings of the Holy Ghost.

The Book of Omni

The Book of Omni is a very interesting one.  Made more so, I think, by the fact that I used to feel it had practically no importance.  It has 5 authors:  Omni, Amaron, Chemish, Abinidom, and Amaleki.  The plates pass from father to son except for when Amaron passes them to Chemish.  These two are brothers, like when Nephi passes them to Jacob, except that these two don't have much to say.

The real meat of this chapter is written by Amaleki.  He writes about Mosiah being "warned of the Lord that he should flee out of the land of Nephi, and as many as would hearken unto the voice of the Lord should also depart..." (Omni 1:12) 

Mosiah and those who go with him were led by the Lord to Zarahemla and another group of people that had come from Jerusalem.  These people are called "the people of Zarahemla" in the text, but the chapter heading identified them as the Mulekites.  I had no idea where that information came from so I searched the internet and found an awesome article that answered a lot of my questions.  It is in the March 1987 Ensign and is called The Mulekites by Garth a Wilson.  I highly recommend reading it if you want to understand the history of the Book of Mormon people.  In Helaman 6:10 it tells us that, Mulek, one of the sons of King Zedekiah was brought by the Lord into the land north while Lehi was brought to the land south.  The people of Zarahemla, the Mulekites, were so excited to see Mosiah and his people because they had brought with them the brass plates.  The Mulekites had been brought by the Lord out of Jerusalem but had no records.  Because of this, "their language had become corrupted."(v.17)  Mosiah directs that they be taught in his language, the two peoples unite, and Mosiah is made king over them.  

This is where the Book of Mormon history can become a little confusing.  You have the Laminites in the land of Nephi in the south.  The Mulekites combined with the Nephites that fled with Mosiah and both peoples together are generally referred to as Nephites.  They live north of the land of Nephi.  More north than that is the  land where the Jaradites used to live.  Coriantumr, the last the Jaradites who were brought to the land at the time of the tower of Babel, lived with the Mulekites for a time before his death and Mosiah translates engraving from a stone that is brought to him that gives an account of Coriantumr.  Actually, Ether was also still alive as a witness of the destruction of the Jaradites, but the plates written by him aren't found until later.

Anyway, Amaleki writes that he has lived to see Mosiah die and his son Benjamin take the thrown.  He, Amaleki, has no seed so he passes the full small plates of Nephi to King Benjamin so he can keep them with the other records.  Before he does so, he writes a little about a group of people that left Zarahemla and returned to the land of Nephi.  These people that left provide us with lots of Book of Mormon stories.  These people are the people that fight the Lamanites off under King Zeniff who confers the kingdom to his son Noah.  We then get the story of wicked King Noah, the prophet Abinadi, and Alma.  We get the story of Noah's son, King Limhi and Ammon--the Mulekite, not the son of Mosiah that cuts off the arms.  In fact, I have to wonder if Mosiah didn't name his son after that Ammon.  Does it say that anywhere?  Or was it just a common name back then?  Anyway, King Mosiah, who is given the thrown by his father, King Benjamin, is the one that sends Ammon and others to find out what happened to that group of people that had left.  Eventually, the Lord helps Ammon and King Limhi make it back to Zarahemla, and the Lord also helps Alma and his follows get there as well.

All very interesting stuff.  I'm so glad that the Book of Omni got me thinking today.

The Book of Jarom

Jarom is the son of Enos, making him the great-grandson of Lehi.  In verse 9, he reminds of the promise the Lord made to Lehi: "Inasmuch as ye will keep my commandments ye shall prosper in the land."

I have heard people reference this when their lives are less than perfect.  They lament that they have kept the commandments, so why are they not prospering?

I have a vague feeling about this.  It is something that I don't quite understand yet, but the Lord does look at things differently than us.  I think this promise is specifically referring to a people, not an individual person.  The Nephites, as a whole people, were watched over in their struggles with the Lamanites--who always seem to be more numerous than them--as long as they are keeping the commandments.  I really do feel the Lord has a greater sense of these things and often speaks of "peoples" and "generations of people."  It is sometimes hard for us to understand because our perspective is so small and narrow.

That being said, the scriptures have a way of teaching us principles to be applied in our own lives through stories that have many layers to them.  I would say that if we keep the commandments we will prosper.  It just kind of depends on your definition of prosper.  It may not mean that we are rich, or that our family is always healthy.  For me it means that even if life is hard, even if it gets really, really hard, when we are close to the Lord, He helps us.  He walks with us and, sometimes, he carries us, just like in the poem Footprints in the Sand.  Having the Lord in your life is to prosper.  He helps us be more than we can be by ourselves.  He is ultimately trustworthy and always there.  When you really think about it, isn't that what matters most?

Enos

Enos is the son of Jacob, the nephew of Nephi.  I always remind the kids I'm teaching of those relationships because, for me, it helps Enos feel more real.  He was real, of course, but we hear so little about the next few prophets that make recordings on the plates of Nephi that it is sometimes hard to feel as if we know them like we know Nephi.  It helps to try to keep things straight as to who is who.

Enos has always intrigued me.  He prays and his sins are forgiven, yet he doesn't stop there.  He is immediately concerned and prays for his brethren, the Nephites.  Once the Lord answers him on that front, he begins to pray for the Lamanites.  I have always felt like it is a guide to judge my own spiritual well-being.  Am I concerned for others enough that their names naturally occur in my prayers?  Can I sincerely pray for my enemies? 

The last verse of Enos makes more of an impact on me when I think of him as a real person, instead of a prophet of the Book of Mormon.  He says in verse 27:

"And I soon go to the place of my rest, which is with my Redeemer; for I know that in him I shall rest.  And I rejoice in the day when my mortal shall put on immortality, and shall stand before him; then shall I see his face with pleasure, and he will say unto me:  Come unto me, ye blessed, there is a place prepared for you in the mansions of my Father.  Amen."

I hope that I can someday feel like that.  Enos writes with such confidence.  It brings to mind Doctrine and Covenants 121:45-46 which reads:

"Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood, shall distil upon they soul as the dews from heaven.  The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever." (emphais added)

Catch Up--Jacob 6 and 7

I have been unable to post for a while.  I thought that something was wrong with the blogger website, but I finally tried from a different computer and it is working, so there is something going on with my computer.  My laptop internet connection is sketchy at best, so it goes without saying I'm not happy with computer technology right now.  Mat would probably say the computer doesn't love me either.  I tend to have more problems than the average person with computers breaking when I'm around. :)

I just want to mention a few things in way of catching up even though I've tried not to read too far ahead of the blog.  Jacob 6 has a couple of favorites in it worth mentioning.  Jacob 6:5 uses the phrase "full purpose of heart" which I have like for years.  I think it is a wonderful way to describe the way that I want to follow the gospel.  No vacillating between what Heavenly Father wants me to do and what the world says.  I have noticed that it can be challenging and yet I wonder if an individual is really sincere in that desire, does it get easier?

Jacob 6:12 is such a wonderful scripture.  It connects me to Jacob like nothing else that he writes.  He has been preaching to the people, trying to deliver the messages Heavenly Father has told him to, and trying through persistent effort to have an effect on the Nephite's behavior hoping to create in them a desire to do good.  In verse 12, I can almost hear him sigh as he says:  "O be wise; what can I say more?"  Don't you just feel like that sometimes as a parent or a friend trying to get through to someone?

Jacob 7 tells the story of Sherem who denies Christ and flatters people away from the gospel.  It is a pretty straight forward story about the way the devil works to deceive.  What really struck me in this chapter was verse 24 where Jacob says that "many means were devised to reclaim and restore the Lamanites to the knowledge of the truth; but it all was vain..."  I think it stood out to me because in Primary we are studying how Ammon and the sons of Mosiah are finally successful in preaching to the Lamanites.  It makes me wonder about life.  Jacob was obviously a faithful prophet of God and yet he had no success in bringing the Lamanites back to the gospel.  Maybe sometimes our best faithful efforts with others won't yield the results we desire, but that doesn't mean we are doing anything wrong.  Maybe what matters is the fact that we put forth the effort, that we are faithful in performing that which was asked of us, and that we do not despair and give up.  Sometimes it can be hard when we don't see the results that we desire, but we need to keep trying.

Jacob 5 (continued)

I realized this weekend how very far behind the ward we are in our family scripture reading of the Book of Mormon.  We never did manage to get a bookmark that had the schedule on it, and so we just read whatever we have time for and discuss what we like and are blissfully unaware.  One of my Primary kids said they were in Alma already which probably explains why one of them always knows the story we are talking about in Primary so well, they just read it with their families.  That makes me smile.

My family is still reading in Jacob, and the last part of Jacob 5 had me crying during family scripture study.  I never really think of myself as a crier, but I guess I do it more than I realize.  Anyway, the Lord of the vineyard works so hard to save his trees and at one point they are all wild/wicked.  This is the Great Apostasy.  He says the Nephites were the last good fruit left and then they turn wild as well.  Sad for them and for the Lord of the vineyard.

Jacob 5 speaks of the goal of the last grafting (the restoration and gathering of Israel in these last days) being that the tree will be one (v.68) and in verse 74 it says "like unto one body."  As we are taught to be one in the gospel, to be one in Christ.

In verse 70, it says the servants were few, and, in verse 72 it says the Lord labored with them.  I like that.

In verses 65 and 66 is says something interesting (the Lord of the vineyard is speaking):

"...ye shall not clear away the bad thereof all at once, lest the roots thereof should be too strong for the graft, and the graft thereof shall perish, and I lose the trees of my vineyard.  For it grieveth me that I should lose the trees of my vineyard: wherefore ye shall clear away the bad according as the good shall grow, that the root and the top may be equal in strength, until the good shall overcome the bad, and the bad be hewn down..."

This scripture is definitely food for thought.

Then in verses 75 and 76, it talks about the Millennium:  "...my vineyard is no more corrupted...for a long time will I lay up of the fruit of my vineyard unto mine own self against the season, which speedily cometh..."

Chapter 5 ends with verse 77 and the end of the world.  I feel kind of uncomfortable with that phrase, "the end of the world."  Why does it always conjure up in my mind images of crazy people in movies?  Perhaps because Hollywood would have us believe that the whole concept isn't real?  Regardless, let me say instead "and the earth will be renewed and receive its paradisaical glory." (Article of Faith 10)  The Lord of the vineyard speaks of evil fruit returning to the vineyard and gathering the good and the bad in order to preserve the good unto himself and cast the bad away.  "And then cometh the season and the end; and my vineyard will I cause to be burned with fire."

Whew--that chapter takes a lot of thinking, but it is undoubtedly worth it.  Yep, I would say Jacob 5 and Zenos' olive tree allegory are anything but boring.

An Umbrella

I love this little riddle from my Primary lesson:

How are an umbrella and a Book of Mormon alike?

The kids in my class actually did a really good job thinking this through...

Do you have any ideas?

 Answer:  With both an umbrella and a Book of Mormon, you have to open them to receive the protection they can give.

Jacob 5

Jacob 5 is "the very long vineyard" chapter as my kids call it.  It is when Jacob quotes Zenos' allegory of the tame and wild olive trees.  Zenos is a prophet that we only know through what other prophets say about him.  It would be interesting to know what other things he wrote. As for this allegory it is about Israel and the gentiles and the scattering and gathering of Israel as it says in the synopsis at the beginning of the chapter.

It is kind of fun to see what I can recognize within the allegory, for example, verses 19 through 25 the Lord of the vineyard visits the natural branches of the tree which have been plucked off and replanted elsewhere in the vineyard.  A few that he planted in poor spots of ground have flourished and brought forth good fruit, but the one he planted in a good spot of ground has brought forth fruit of which half is good and half is wild.  Who does that sound like?  To me is sounds like the promised land and the Nephites and Lamanites.  Later, in the chapter it says of this particular branch:

"...this...I did plant in a good spot of ground; yea, even that which was choice unto me above all other parts of the land of my vineyard.  And thou beholdest that I also cut down that which cumbered this spot of ground, that I might plant this tree in the stead thereof."

Kimball, who was looking bored to tears as we read this in family scripture reading did perk up a bit as we tried to decipher what was being said.  He recognized that the Jaredites had been brought to the promised land before Lehi's family, but had killed themselves off through war.  In fact, I found a footnote reference that took me to the Book of Mormon chapter about the Jaredites that I feel helped me understand some things in Jacob 5 better.  I read the first half of Ether 13.  The footnote I found was under Jacob 5:63 and only referenced verses 10-12, but I understood much better when I went back and started at verse 1.  (So if you are having trouble understanding, I recommend reading Ether 13:1-13.)  I was seeking to understand the whole "and the last shall be first and the first shall be last" thing that is mentioned so often in the scriptures.  I don't know if anyone else has scriptural concepts that they feel they have to learn over and over again, but this is one of those for me.  I'll read the scriptures and think that I get it, but then next time I come across those words in a different context, the meaning becomes hazy.  In verse 63 it says:

"Graft in the branches; begin at the last that they may be first and that the first maybe last..."

Then, Ether 13:11-12 says:

"And then also cometh the Jerusalem of old; and the inhabitants thereof, blessed are they, for they have been washed in the blood of the Lamb; and they are they who were scattered and gathered in from the four quarters of the earth, and from the north countries, and are partakers of the fulfilling of the covenant which God made with their father, Abraham.  And when these things come, bringeth to pass the scripture which saith, there are they who were first, who shall be last; and there are they who were last who shall be first."

That reference really does answer the question, but like I said, if it seems as clear as mud, start in Ether 13:1.

Abraham and The Little Mermaid

Jacob 4:5 refers to Abraham offering up his son Isaac in the wilderness.  This was a very hard scripture story for me to understand when I was younger.  When I was a child, it didn't bother me because I knew that Abraham didn't really have to go through with it.  An angel stopped him and a ram was found to sacrifice instead, but as I got older I realized that Abraham would have done it if those things hadn't happened and that was a little hard for me to swallow.  Why would the Lord ask such a thing?  How could Abraham be willing to do such a thing?  I'm sure there are many levels of this that I have yet to understand, but what I do understand is what Jacob points out in verse 5--it was in "similitude of God and his Only Begotten Son."

Thinking about things in light of Abraham laying Isaac on the alter brings a new dimension to the Atonement and the sacrifice of the Savior, it makes me think of how hard it must have been for Heavenly Father to withdraw his spirit from his perfect son, if only for a short time, and leave him on his own during his time of need.  I first understood the Father's sacrifice when I was in high school.  You are going to laugh, or maybe cringe, at the way I came to understand it.

I was watching Disney's The Little Mermaid.  For those who might not know the movie, King Triton is the king of the sea and his daughter, Ariel, signed a contract with the sea witch that, at the end of the movie, results in Ariel belonging to the witch.  The witch is about to turn her into a pitiful piece of seaweed when King Triton shows up and agrees to take his daughter's place.  By doing so, Ursula, the witch, gains control of the whole ocean.  She gains his crown and his powerful trident.  I remember watching this play out on the TV in my basement and understanding that Triton was weak.  He couldn't bear to watch his daughter suffer, so he sacrificed everything and everyone in the ocean to save her.  I remember feeling very grateful to Heavenly Father for being strong and loving enough to watch his Only Begotten son suffer and die so that I could live with him again someday.
 
At the time, I thought a Disney movie was an odd way to learn a gospel lesson, but I knew it was effective for me, a seminary student studying Abraham with a questioning mind who happened to watch The Little Mermaid that same week.  Now I have many other similar life experiences that have given me a testimony that Heavenly Father, through the Spirit, teaches us each important lessons in a myriad of ways.  He teaches things to each of us using the materials that are in our own lives to work with.  It is one reason to make sure you keep your life full of materials that don't drive the spirit away.  Give him something he can work with and he will teach you amazing things in very simple ways.

Thank You, Nephi

2 Nephi 33 is Nephi's farewell.  When we read it in family scripture reading a few weeks ago, I was a real bawl baby.  I was feeling kind of sheepish, when I looked up and saw that Evan had a tear in his eye as well.  He is my little softie.  I love him!

The thing that gets me about this chapter is that Nephi talks about how he isn't very good with the written word.  He says he is much better at speaking because the Holy Ghost helps so much when he's speaking.  If he is better at speaking than writing, how I would have loved to hear him speak!  But what I really want to point out, once again, is Nephi's faith.  In verse 4 he says:

"...And the words which I have written in weakness will be made strong unto them; for it persuadeth them to do good..."

He had faith that the Holy Ghost would bring his words into people's hearts as he had seen happen when he was speaking.  I hope someday I really will get to meet him like he says I will in verse 11:  "...you and I will stand face to face at his bar..."  I hope he is not just talking about people that dismissed his words.  I hope that I can meet him so I can tell him how much his words meant to me.  I hope I can meet him because I want to thank him.

2 Nephi 32

This is a wonderful chapter.  There are so many verses I could write about, but today I focused on verse 9 as I studied because it had a lesson in it for me.

I have been struggling with my Primary class lately.  I love the kids.  I was so excited to teach the Book of Mormon this year because it is the book of scripture I know best, and there is where my problem began.  I know it well, so I have been failing to sincerely ask my Heavenly Father's help in teaching its concepts to the children.  2 Nephi 32:9 helped me realize that this morning.  It says:

"...I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul."

Whenever I have to teach a Relief Society lesson, I say many prayers as I prepare.  Why wouldn't I be praying with that vigor just because I am now teaching children?  I have offered up prayers that I might receive guidance with discipline because my main problem is that the kiddos won't stop jabbering.  The answer I received is that the lesson needs to be worthy of their attention.  I need to be well prepared and have something (a game etc.) to allow them to participate and have a little time out of their chairs.  Three hours is a long time to sit.  But I have not been praying to have the Spirit with me as I teach.  How can I expect to teach spiritual things without the Spirit?

Another thing I learned today was why the scripture says "he will consecrate thy performance unto thee."  Don't we usually consecrate things unto the Lord?  I looked up consecrate in the dictionary, but that didn't help much.  I looked up the footnote references which confirmed the consecrating-things-unto-the-Lord theory, but didn't shed much light on my question.  So, I said a prayer that I might understand.  I can see now that it means we need to pray when we are performing a task for the Lord, like teaching a lesson or performing another service, so that we will be able to accomplish the thing in the way the Lord would have it done.  By doing so, it is added to the body of service we have given for the Lord during our time here on earth.  It is consecrated unto us.We learn much from giving service in such a way.  We gain confidence in our relationship with our Father in Heaven, and we add to our faith.  Our performance is then for the welfare of our souls.  Our body of service is definitely something we will take with us when we die.

Hope

2 Nephi 31:20 says:

"Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life."

 There are some scriptures that are more difficult to write about.  This is one of them.  It is so perfect, so eloquent that it feels odd that I would attempt to expound upon its teachings with my own words.  However, that does not stop me from trying :)

I just wanted to record a few thoughts I had upon reading this scripture.  First of all, whenever I read the phrase "endure to the end" I think of a General Conference talk I once heard that said we should think of it more as "progressing to the end."  I can't find the talk or remember, with surety, who gave it, but I remember the message was one that spoke to my heart.  I thought of it like this--we are not supposed to merely endure, hanging on by our fingertips to our testimony as we ride through the ups and downs of life, but we are supposed to improve and build upon our understanding of the gospel as we are guided around and through the deep pitfalls and majestic summits we encounter during our time on earth.  As Elder Bednar would say--We are to act and not simply be acted upon.

The other thought I had when I read this wonderful scripture was how my understanding of hope has changed since I was young.  When I was a teenager, I distinctly remember trying to have hope.  I tried to will hope into my being much like I might try to strong arm a locked door to open, with about as much success too.  "Have some hope, Ambra."  I would tell myself whenever despair crept into my life.  It didn't really work and now I understand why.  I was trying to hope and then perfect myself.  I was reading the scriptures and going to church and trying very hard not to do anything wrong because to me when the scriptures said "repent" it sounded an awful lot like a chastising that I didn't want to be worthy of.  I didn't understand the Atonement.  I didn't understand that precious gift that Christ gave to us.  I didn't understand that the scriptures are continually urging repentance because everyone, prophets and apostles included, needs repentance because we can't perfect ourselves.  We must rely on Jesus Christ for our perfection.  We must come to trust him and love him and believe on his words if we want to live with Heavenly Father again.  It is when we do this that hope springs up in our souls like a wildflower, natural and lovely to behold.  It is through that hope that we come to love Christ more, trust him more.  It is a wonderful cycle that includes faith and charity in it.  I used to always marvel that a little thing like hope was included by Paul as one of the big three, as in "faith, hope, and charity."  Now, I see its worth, and feel it is a most grand concept.

2 Nephi 30

In 2 Nephi 30:12-18 it talks about when "the wolf [shall] dwell with the lamb; and the leopard shall lie down with the kid, and the calf and the young lion, and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them."

If you look at footnote a of verse 12 it refers you to Isaiah 63:25 and the Topical Guide under Earth, Renewal of.  Isaiah 65:25 says much the same thing as verse 12 with the wolf and the lamb feeding together instead of one eating the other one, then it says:  "They shall not hurt nor destroy in all my holy mountain, saith the Lord."

I feel like sometimes we, as a society, want this to be true now.  We want everything to be marvelous and perfect, almost to the point of not accepting the realities of life.  Almost to the point of not putting the cycle of nature, as it is now, in it's proper perspective.  I have watched over the years as the commercials on TV that try to play on our sympathies and get us to donate money have gradually changed from asking for help for starving children into laying before us the plight of the polar bear.  It honestly feels like our society talks more about, and worries more about, the earth and the animals than people.  I'm not saying we shouldn't take care of our earth, but to me worrying so much over the polar bear seems to be one of Satan's distractions from what is really going on.  Satan can be a master magician, employing the art of distracting the audience with one hand as he performs the real tricky work with the other.

If you look under Earth, Renewal of in the Topical Guide it gives many references but the one I was checking for is one of the last.  It is Articles of Faith 10  "...the earth will be renewed and receive its paradisiacal glory."  This is when "they shall not hurt nor destroy in all my holy mountain."  Until then we are stewards of this earth and have been very blessed to have food that comes from the earth and its animals.  We can take care of the earth, but know that things in nature have cycles that are natural.  We can worry less about that stuff and more about the things the prophets guide us to focus on.  Teaching our children, serving others, and studying the gospel.  These things will bring us happiness and peace.

The Testimony of Two Nations is a Witness

As I read 2 Nephi 29 this morning, I felt in my heart what a wonderful time in history this is to be alive.  I have heard people say that before but have never really felt it.  I remember President Hinckley saying it time and time again, and yet I always felt it was more scary than wonderful. 2 Nephi 29:1-2 speaks of the "marvelous work" the Lord will be doing as he remembers the covenants he has made unto the children of men by, among other things, bringing forth the words of the Nephites.  The Lord then goes on to say that people will reject the words because they feel they already have all the words of God in the Bible.  And so we see the scary and the wonderful together, but for some reason the wonder has won out for me today and for that I am grateful.

2 Nephi 29:7-9 is a direct response to those who reject additional scriptures given to us by our Heavenly Father.  It says:

"Know ye not that there are more nations than one?  Know ye not that I, the Lord you God, have created all men, and that I remember those who are upon the isles of the sea; and that I rule in the heavens above and in the earth beneath; and I bring forth my word unto the children of men, yea, even upon all the nation of the earth?  Wherefore murmur ye, because that ye shall receive more of my word?  Know ye not that the testimony of two nations is a witness unto you that I am God, that I remember one nation like unto another.  And when the two nations shall run together the testimony of the two nations shall run together also.  And I do this that I may prove unto many that I am the same yesterday, today, and forever..."

These are great and logical scriptures.  I love the clarity of the reasoning laid out for us about why the Bible and Book of Mormon were written and given to us--"two nations is a witness" and "I do this that I may prove unto many that I am the same yesterday, today, and forever."  I marked them, excitedly thinking of my friend, who kindly handed back the Book of Mormon I had given her, explaining that she believes the Bible to be the only scriptures given to us by God.  I didn't argue with her, but I felt sorry that she was missing out on so many powerful testimonies.  I think, maybe, if the same thing happened again tomorrow, I could put the Lord's reasoning into my own words and speak a little bit about it.  I do realize that you can never convince someone through logic and reasoning.  Spiritual things are taught by the spirit, but if I keep a prayer in my heart perhaps next time the spirit can convey something to the heart of my friend when given more to work with than my silence.